DEADPOOL WAS GONNA BE IN THE SHANG-CHI CAGE FIGHTS

And They Fucking Thought They Could Get Away With It

New concept art from Shang-Chi and the legend of the ten rings revealed that Deadpool was supposed to make his big MCU debut and they fucking scrapped it!

I imagine whoever’s idea it was to put Deadpool in Shang-Chi got promoted, and whoever vetoed the idea got fired.

This image was created by Andrew Kim and depicts both Deadpool and Proxima Midnight duking it out in the art work. Nobody is really sure if the photo was just Kim dicking around and showing off The Golden Daggers Club and what kinda shit goes on there, or if it truly was supposed to be Deadpool instead of Abomination and Wong.

The main ish is that Proxima Midnight ain’t alive cause Tony killed them with the Infinity Stones. Soo….However I have a lot to say on this subject

1. um, that doesn’t matter because no one is really dead when it comes to comic book stuff
2. He could have been the one fighting Abomination
3. He could have fought literally anyone else
4. He could have fought Wong. I think we would all give our left kidneys for that fight.

Anyways, guess they had to introduce Abomination cause he is showing up in She-Hulk, so we had to be reminded that he’s still a thing. And Wong, well he’s just so damn lovable and cute why don’t they just throw him in one scene in every MCU movie like instead of Sam J?

All I want to know is, where the heck is Deadpool? Cause he did show up with Korg in a commercial announcing his MCU return. BUT WAS THAT IT? WAS THAT THE BIG OH IM DEADPOOL IM IN THE MCU LOOK AT ME AND KORG.

OMG. 5. He could have fought Korg!

Some people might be like, shut up hoe, stop complaining cause we are definitely getting a Deadpool 3 which is legit af. But to those people I say, you shut up you dumb hoe, I want to see Deadpool in the Multiverse of Madness! Maybe just running around in the X-Mansion feeding grapes to Colossus or something.

But Ryan Reynolds told us he’s not in the Doctah Strange movie. Which is like, do we believe him? I don’t know. Cause I trust that man with my life, but I also trusted Andrew Garfield and Tobey Maguire with my life as well, and look how that turned out.

I am a ghost.

Mmmmm yeah. K Bye.

XOXO,

Comic Book Bitch

The Queen in Black is Back! Black Cat #3 Comic Book Recap

Writer: Jed MacKay

Artist: C.F. Villa

If you don’t know what’s going on in Felicia Hardy’s world during this King In Black Marvel Event, I suggest you check out my previous Black Cat Recap.

Now that we’re all caught up, you know that Felicia touched the magic wand that Doctor Strange was going to use to defeat the symbiote army, however since Doctor Strange was incapacitated Felicia decided to do it herself.

This issue finds Felicia trapped in a dark room with Black Fox, her father’s mentor, or rather, a dude who has taken on the shape of Black Fox? She believes that after she touched the wand she died, but Fox assures her this isn’t true.

Not the Black Fox aye? Definitely a Silver Fox tho

He goes on to tell her that he is old magic and basically he’s there to see if she’s worthy of the power she’s now holding.

Back in the real world she’s basically on autopilot, or as I like to call it, “being blacked out from overconsumption.”

Or at least that’s the only time I’ve had that experience. I’ve never touched an Asgardian wand. But I do know what I’m going to call going out to get drunk from now on.

Same thing I say when I see myself in a snapchats the day after a blackout! Wow so much in common.

So Felicia is all “I need to get back” and Fox is all “Come walk through this weird chess room with me.”

Oh I get it, it’s a test.

Felicia heads back and forth from the Asgardian body to the Magic Box or whatever the thing is that she is in, and she kills some symbiote dragons. I can explain this by coming to from a black out, or if you watch Always Sunny in Philadelphia, then it’s called “browning out”

Me replaying an IG story of taking a shot as another gets placed in my hand.

Fox decides to test her and find out her vulnerabilities and it goes like this:

Fox: When did you feel most vulnerable?

Black Cat: When my mom told me my dad died, but he was just in jail. So she a lyin’ ass hoe.

Fox: Gross.

BC: Yeah rude af. But I guess that was hard on her?

Fox: But mostly hard on you, right? Like when Doc Ock fucked up your shit?

BC: Yeah that sucked.

Doctor Strange then wakes us from his coma and he’s like she touched it? GOD DAMMIT! Meanwhile Asgardian Black Cat is still mercin’ all these hoes.

Still don’t know when she found time to braid her hair.

Felicia and Fox continue their “deep” conversation.

Fox : You needed power, Spider-Man showed you that. But no one would give you power except King Pin

Black Cat: Yeah. I know, idiot. I was there.

Read this. It’s kind of the point of the issue and I’m too lazy to explain.

Anyways

Fox: Look at all these people who beat you up.

BC: This is annoying, shut up.

Fox: Are you ready to say yes to ultimate power?

BC: Depends on what I get.

Fox: Your family back together

BC: Cool.

Fox: Power to kill all your enemies.

BC: Cool, cool.

Fox: All your former lovers will love you again.

BC: Those fucking nerds? Hell no! Fuck you I don’t want it!

Fox: WHUUUU??

SOMEBODY CATCH HER!

One of her nerds catches her from the sky and then Doctor Strange is all “wtf.”

And Black Cat is all “I almost took it all, but I really didn’t wanna touch Spider-Man’s peen again.”

It’s almost like it’s inside him

Of course it does end there, a bunch of symbiotes dragons are flying towards them.

Felicia asks Doctor Strange to magic her buddies out of there because all she wants is her nerds to be safe. They get teleported away to safety and Felicia and the Doctor get ready to fight some symbiotes.

Peen-nuts. Now I get it.

AND THAT’S THAT!

Their story continues in King in Black #4!

let me know in the comments if you’d like me to do a recap of that one. I do loves me some Black Cat!

Has Wanda Learned Her Lesson At All? According To This Sneak Peek, NO!

I know we’re all very excited for tomorrow’s episode of WandaVision, but for comic books fans it’s a bit of a slow burn because we kinda already know what’s going to happen. But this is technically the MCU and they could change things up at any moment.

First off, there are so many theories about how this show is going to go. One of the theories is that Quicksilver is secretly Mephisto, there’s another theory that Ultron has been hiding in the Hex the whole time, Agnes is Agatha Harkness, etc.

I do believe Agnes is Agatha Harkness, btw, she was dressed as a freaking witch for Halloween. DUH.

Anyways, before I get into MY theories, I just wanted to point out that Wanda does not fucking care that she is controlling all of these people. She is acting more like she has a hangover than she feels any sort of remorse. However, I do believe that although this is her HEX, somehow Hydra is involved and probably aided in creating this Hex since she can’t remember how it started and isn’t quite sure how she’s doing it. Obviously Hydra is involved because the commercials are for Hydra shit.

ANYWAYS, now for my theories, Remember how Vision almost died in episode 6 because he was trying to crawl out of the Hex? Is the Hex the only thing keeping him alive? He was literally falling apart being outside of it, so that’s scary because if she gets rid of the Hex she kills Vision. That’s why she expanded it, but of course if he keeps trying to leave she can’t take over the whole world…Or can she?

All we know is that she stole Vision’s body. We don’t know when or how he came back to life. Cause you know Thanos killed him. For real. This could be tied into how the Hex is changing people’s body composition. Like, how Monica was warned not to go back in the Hex because her body was changing. Did Billy and Tommy get powers from the Hex or was it because they are Wanda’s children?

Speaking of Monica, is her body changing in a way that will give her powers? I think so. Since she has powers in the comic book, she might be getting them from the Hex in this version of her character.

The last theory I want to talk about is Quicksilver. This is Evan Peters, not Aaron Taylor Johnson. Everyone is just dismissing this as ATJ needed to be recast or that this will open the world to the Fox mutants.

I sort of agree, in that this is going to open up to a new world. But to the Fox mutants? I don’t know, what I do know is that Wanda will be in Doctor Strange’s Multiverse of Madness, which finds the heroes in many different dimensions, the most popular ones I can think of from the comic books is Earth-65 and Earth-616, but obviously, there’s a lot.

We’re getting three different Spider-Men, SO!

Perhaps Evan Peters is simply a Quicksilver from another dimension! She pulled him from his own dimension, a world where he survived the shooting.

This explains why he mentions being shot, but it doesn’t explain why Wanda sees him as a dead body like she saw Vision as a dead body. Of course she could just be seeing this because that’s her memory of her brother in this dimension.

BUT I’m pretty sure this is a different dimension’s Quicksilver that she brought in, which would be a great introduction to the Multiverse of Madness, since now we know we can take characters from any dimension. INCLUDING villains!

Also, twincest.

Hey, it’s my brother, but it’s my brother from another dimension.

TBH I thought she had more chemistry with Aaron Taylor Johnson.

-Comic Book Betch

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